So this is wonderful. I’m sitting at home playing PS4 when I get the call from Sergeant Conners. He’s such a fucking douchebag that everyone in the platoon avoids him when they can. I, however, know he’s got his uses. Being the asshole that he is, he can piss off the right people when I don’t want to be bothered. Sadly he out ranks me so I took the call. I swear I’m the only mother fucker that answers the phone.
“Get pass the word to EVERYONE we need to get to the Armory ASAP!.” There’s a slight panic in his voice. A sense of urgency I’ve never quite heard from him before.
“Yeah sure, I gotta shave and-” I sigh outloud having to pause the game I’m playing.
“Do it there!” He yells, but I really don’t think he meant to. “Get in full battle rattle and go report to the Major Lopez.” Major Lopez is our AGR, Active Guard Reserve. He’s a fulltimer in a world of part time weekend warriors.
“Yeah, roger whats going on? We getting activated?”
“Yeah dude, turn on the t.v. shit’s a fucking nightmare!”
I don’t watch television. Mostly because its shit, but I do the next best thing and check out facebook. To be honest, the status’ and updates I was seeing should’ve made me upset, but really it did nothing more than get me excited.
EXPLOSION AT U.S-MEXICO BORDER CROSSING!
Holy fuck balls. I thought. We’re going to war with Mexico! I couldn’t have been more wrong. And you know what, I’m happy that I was.